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What is Shyness Costing You?



Shyness is actually very common with a little over half of the population identifying as being shy whether that be slightly or extremely. For many, being shy may not be overly problematic but what about those for whom it is? If our shyness is left unattended, if we don't learn to to work with it, to overcome it what then?


Until I learned to overcome it, my shyness cost me a lot. Before I got to grips with it, my shyness had a firm grip on me impacting my thoughts, feelings and behaviours as well as impacting me physically, none of which were helpful.


Thoughts

  • Constantly comparing myself to others and always feeling lesser

  • Worrying about future events and trying to predict what might happen

  • Always imagining worst case scenario

  • Fretting over past events, replaying them over and over ruminating over how I'd been perceived or what I'd done/said wrong

  • Worrying about being judged

  • Self limiting beliefs

  • Believing I was lesser than others in some ways

  • Thinking I was a burden


Feelings

  • Lonely

  • Isolated

  • Not good enough

  • Excluded

  • Dismissed

  • Unheard

  • Unimportant

  • Overlooked

  • Undervalued

  • Anxious

  • Scared

Behaviours

  • Leaving situations at the earliest opportunity

  • Saying no to great opportunities, both personal and professional

  • Keeping quiet and not sharing my opinions

  • Allowing others take advantage of me

  • Letting others take the credit for my efforts

  • Not being assertive

  • Not putting myself forward for things I knew I could do

  • Not challenging others when I knew they were wrong

  • Hiding in the background

  • Walking with my head down all the time to avoid eye contact

Physical

  • Blushing

  • Churning stomach

  • Tripping over words

  • Needing a nervous pee all the time

  • Jelly legs

  • Dry mouth

  • Hot and cold sweats

  • Sleepless nights

If you’re content with how shyness has shaped your life that’s great, I’m not here to tell you things should be any different but I know from personal experience how real the struggle can be. The good news is it needn't be like that forever. If like me, you’re saying no to opportunities and activities when you’d really like to say yes, if you feel overlooked, if you’re hiding in the background, if you feel being shy is holding you back and you'd like to learn how to overcome shyness, then drop me a line today.







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